so i'm asking myself, "why, why do they let their light shine sometimes and not others?" it always seems i find my answer when i look into my own life. as a child, as a teen, and even as an adult, i can remember times of doing the same thing. sometimes feeling confident and secure and other times looking for my acceptance and approval amidst those around me. it seemed to prove my never-ending need of hearing my Father tell me He loves me and experiencing His unconditional acceptance and approval. when that Truth seemed distant in my life, i would look to others to fill that need which is impossible for them to do. comromising myself to get acceptance never really brought the results that i thought it would because it never seemed complete and was ever changing. so, blending into the world around me felt pointless and hopeless. you never really feel acceptance when you have to compromise who you are to get it. the times that i remember being the most enjoyable in my life were the times when i felt confident in knowing who i was, a child of God who was loved, accepted, and approved of, looking to shine His love and acceptance to those in my world. remembering at the time, that i was purposed in this world as a light and loving that light, i enjoyed shining it in the dark places of the world that i was exposed to.
so i guess the answer to my question about my children is that sometimes the understanding of the Truth about their approval before God is far away from them. recognizing that helps me to know how to pray for them and not get frustrated with them. then i can expect God to reveal His love to them and cause them to feel the unconditional acceptance as His child that satisfies when nothing else will, so that they can stand and shine His Light once again. i think of the song that i sang when i was a little girl, "this little light of mine, i'm going to let in shine......" i didn't quite understand the impact of that song then. but now, i can see that God has set us, my children included, in this world to experience His Life and shine that great Light into our small world bringing salvation to those who accept it, there isn't a happier way to live than letting Jesus change our world through us. then when we stand in confidence that we have something in us that they need, not the other way around, rejection will not even have a hold on us. it will be just like shaking off the dust and moving on.