savoring this moment

i did not get much sleep last night. my lttle bubba (my baby boy) kept waking up and not really wanting to go back to sleep. he does usually still wake up about once a night. but, i usually pick him up, cuddle him a few minutes and lay him back down. usually he goes back to sleep pretty quickly. but, last night?? nooo!!! he just wanted me to hold him. he did not even want to lay down in bed with me, which is what i resort to other nights if he won't go right back to sleep. so, i held him and waited for him to nod off in my arms and laid him in his bed. but, the response was not "lala land" but instant tears. repeating this same scenario several times over about an hour, i was tempted to get frustrated. i was so tired myself. then, i remembered my other children and how big they have gotten, how fast it went, and how sad that made me. i began to think that it would not be very long before Jacob would not wake up in the middle of the night and want his mommy, he will be too big for me to cuddle in my arms, and that it would happen much faster than i wanted it to. so, i resolved to quit trying to make him go back to sleep in his bed and went downstairs to continue to hold him in my arms, just loving him and enjoying his little body snuggled up in my arms until we both fell asleep on the couch, a wonderful memory that i will hold dear to my heart for the rest of my life and his. waking up about an hour later, we both went back to our own beds. but, with a relaxed, peaceful mind instead of frustration and exhaustion. i look at him this morning and smile and realize why i love him so much. he is mine and he is just so darn cute. how could i resist him?

i am thoroughly enjoying every minute of my baby's life. it is going to go by way too fast. i know from experience. i love this little gift from God that has been given to my family. i am not going to let one minute go by and not savor it. i think having a baby so many years after my other children were past their baby years has caused me to appreciate every stage in his life so much more, because i see how fast all of those stages went by in my other kids. if anyone is wondering, i would recommend having a few children close together so they can grow up together and enjoy their siblings. but, save one for later in life when they are older, and so are you. so that you can stop and enjoy some of the moments you forgot to when you had so much going on you did not think you had time to. it is a wonderful experience for my older children as well. they are great with him and love him so much. can't imagine our lives without him and i'm going to savor every moment.