i am weak!

i am weak!

i get frustrated and raise my voice to get my point across with my kids. i yell at them. i have tried and tried to change this so many times. i just keep reverting back every time. i am weak!

I get defensive when i feel judged by others. i defend myself, either by pointing out their issues or trying to make mine not look so bad. i have tried not to do this so many times and just not let what others say or feel about me affect me, but i can't. i am weak!

i do not always use my best judgment when spending money. i spend when i shouldn't sometimes. then, i feel frustrated with myself for not being disciplined. i have tried to change this in me and i make promises to myself to change. i do well for a while and then i seem to fail again and again. i am weak!

i am not always disciplined with my time. i leave the things that i do not like to do until the last possible minute. cleaning is always the last thing that i want to do and usually i put it off until i can not put it off anymore. i have tried to make myself schedules and goals but i never stick to them for long. i am weak!

i catch myself saying things that are not always true, sometimes before i even think it through. I lie. how does that happen? i only want truth to come forth from my mouth so i have determined in myself to always think completely through my thoughts before i speak. but, i still always seem to fail. i am weak!

i try to figure things out too much. i want to see if i can make life work the way that i want it to. i try to master life and then it masters me. i try to just trust God and rest in His will but i seem to always find myself back in the "trying to figure it out mode" again and again. i am weak!

i glory in my weaknesses! recognizing them and acknowledging them is necessary for me to receive His strength. emptying me of my own efforts, of the "me" solution, in trying to change myself prepares me for being filled with His power. "for the sake of Christ, i am well pleased and take pleasure in distresses; for when i am weak, then i am strong." (II corinthians 12:10)

my efforts only dam up His power in my life, stopping the flow of His grace to empower me to overcome. but, when i recognize my weakness and helplessness to overcome and look to the Overcomer to empower me, the dam that stops the flow of His grace is broken and the power rushes through to rescue me, unhindered and freely able to revive me from futility to make me strong. "for God sets Himself against the proud, but gives grace and power to the humble." (I peter 5:5)

none of my weaknesses are so big that God's grace cannot take care of them. His power does not diminish in any way. It is sufficient to meet me in every area of my life. and, as i surrender them to Him so that all can see the power of God's grace dwell upon me and strengthen me to overcome my weaknesses, His strength is perfected in my life and radiates His glory. "My grace is enough for you; for My strength and power are made perfect and show themselves most effective in your weakness. therefore, i will all the more gladly glory in my weaknesses, that the strength and power of Christ may rest and dwell upon me!" (II corinthians 12:9)

i glory in my weaknesses so that i can rid myself of them and live in His strength!

i am weak!